I turned twenty one in November, which means I'm an adult now, there's no more coming of age ages to turn. But I don't feel like an adult...to this day when I do something "adultish," like go to the grocery store or try to pay a bill online I feel like a little kid playing pretend. I feel like the adult police will pull me over on the highway, fine me for impersonating an adult and send me home to mom. (You know the adult police, they're those evil prudes who quiz you about world affairs and the details of the recession and then verbally berate you for not knowing). Consequently, none of my other friends feel like adults to me either, it's really strange to see them running around doing big kid things. They're getting engaged, getting nine to five jobs, graduating college, going back to college and finding hot dates online...yet they're just babies to me. One of the first things that struck me when I attended a college in Florida was how young everyone was...and it seemed like they were all just as afraid to get caught by the adult police as I was. I wish I could say it was comforting to see that most kids my age have no idea what they're doing with their lives, but it really wasn't. I personally would like to know that someone has their shit together...after all, we are the "real" adults of tomorrow.
A friend and spiritual big sister of mine deals with this situation in an intriguing way...she calls doing adult things, "doing big girl stuff." To her adulthood isn't a permanent state of being, so much as some shoes you have to wear around every once in a while or, as she puts it, "sometimes you have to put on your big girl panties." I found this to be a more effective strategy than worrying about whether or not I have a firm grip on reality or hiding out from the adult police. So I’m trying to employ a new strategy: try to be myself…not an “adult.” When those dreaded adult things come up, like bills, career decisions and accepting responsibility for rear ending someone…I’ll put on my big girl panties and view them as a perk, not an unachievable black belt.
Inspirational Quotes:
“As we come to grips with our own selfishness and stupidity, we make friends with the imposter and accept that we are impoverished and broken and realize that, if we were not, we would be God. The art of gentleness toward ourselves leads to being gentle with others—and is a naturally prerequisite for our presence to God in prayer.” –Brennan Manning
"Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."- Jesus
“Sometimes…it’s hard to wear the big girl panties!” -Stina
